[ it's almost kind of hilarious to watch, actually... especially since Tsurumaru kept saying and saying that a dog would be good for Hijikata - but it seems like the plan is backfiring! ]
Hmm... Maybe... [ a pause. here comes sarcastic response number 2 (but is it sarcastic!? hmm...). ] If you beg for it.
[ then there's Ume who lets out a tiny puppy whine every few seconds and butts her head against Hijikata's thigh. ]
She does a better job at it.
[ he retracts the hand from Ume and covers his mouth to stifle a small laugh. this is so amusing to him!? but, ah... he doesn't want to actually upset Tsurumaru though... strangely enough. ]
But if something bothers you, don't do the silent treatment and give me nasty looks. I can tell, you know.
Do you want me to get on my hands and knees, then? [ into the sin bin with you! but he's also kidding... maybe... sort of...
for all we know, he could very well not be kidding at all. but he sees that opportunity!! so he reaches out, yanking at hijikata's wrist, trying to, well... there's a part of him that wants to hold his hand, and then there's another part of him that wants to press his cheek against his hand, but he goes with the second option.
except, he's still trying to tug... tug, tug... in the meantime — ] Not that anyone's ever let me do that, you know — to mention what bothers me.
[ because, you know, he's a sword. no one asks swords these questions as if they're actual people!!
he smiles sweetly, but in the way that people smile before they say something unpleasant. ] If you ask me, nasty looks are more effective.
[ we all know Hijikata's 100% down for that, let's be real.
it seriously feels like he's babysitting two kids now. there's a dog that keeps butting her head against his thigh, or trying to climb into his lap when Hijikata doesn't pay attention to her.
then there's Tsurumaru trying to tug at Hijikata's hand also like a kid.
Geez... ]
You guys are like kids... [ he sighs. what he doesn't notice is that Hijikata finds himself taking hold of Tsurumaru's hand and just... well, holding it!? he feels weird today... huh. ]
of course, when Tsurumaru comments about the hand holding thing, Hijikata only blinks. his eyes flicker down for a brief moment before he just huffs. ]
That's none of your business. [ but he… doesn't let go. if anything, his grip might feel a tad bit tighter, and squeeze Tsurumaru's hand… ]
Shut up. [ huff huff… if Tsurumaru tries to pull his hand or anything - he might find out Hijikata won't… let go yet. ]
[ gosh, do you not realize it when you grab someone else's hand...! out of curiosity, tsurumaru will try to pry his hand away; not that he wants to, but just to see what he'd do. in a usual situation, hijikata would pull away, wouldn't he? ]
Then, you should be willing to let go — [ an experimental yank, but if anything, his grip has only tightened.
while he does like to tease him, he's usually never this persistent?? so tsurumaru's going to cover all his bases first, just in case. ]
Did I do something wrong? You're only like this when I've knocked over your tea set, or bleached your dark kimonos... and I haven't done anything like that lately.
[ nothing's wrong... it's just... weird!? hey, Hijikata's a pretty truthful guy, and he's pretty true to himself. usually when he's "forward" with whatever it is, he's pretty aware of it - and he does it on his own free will too.
it's not that he's embarrassed he's has just been caught off guard, for sure! that's it...
so now that Tsurumaru is kind of teasing him, it's kind of... he doesn't even know how to put it. if anything, it just makes him extremely huffy because he doesn't have control of the situation.
now he realizes; he's caught off guard, rendering himself speechless. he's just here, holding his hand and just saying nothing? Tsurumaru is teasing him too. it's not really anything cool or suave at all!?
Hijikata's losing his cool points. that's what matters. and he's going to fix it? ]
It's not that... [ he only reaches up with his other hand to grab Tsurumaru's chin to bring his face closer. closer, and closer... enough so that only Tsurumaru can hear Hijikata's faiiint whisper (not that there's... anyone else to hear it, unless you count the dog): ]
Do you dislike it? It can be something else entirely if that's what you want... You just have to say it.
[ he's pulled close enough to the point where everything is now closer than he knows what to do with, and he freezes, now only dimly aware of everything around him; how he's so close that tsurumaru can feel the warmth that radiates off of him, and if he breathes, he picks up certain scents, of tea and ink and faint kiseru smoke, and all of it makes him dizzy because he's so close, filling his ears with the sound of his own heartbeat and the sounds of those words and what those words mean.
still, even if his embarrassment is blatantly obvious, his cheeks a darker tint of red by now — he likes this, more than he wants to admit. he fumbles for words to say, but finds that none of them will make it right then and there; so instead, he gives hijikata's hand a light squeeze, glancing off towards the side. ]
No, I don't... dislike it at all. [ and for some reason, he adds on the next part, a bit more quietly. ] I think you should do it more often.
[ both the handholding and the... you know. anyway, while not as much as before, tsurumaru's going to attempt to regain some footing. there's a pause of deliberation, and then he bounces back with a wry smile, resuming the teasing sort of tone to his voice. ]
And, if I said that I wanted it to be something else... what would you do? Would you prove to me that there's actually some bite to your bark?
[ listen, ume might be asleep, but she's learning all of this filthy talk in her sleep... goodbye puppy purity. ]
look its not his fault. sits in the sin bin dont worry ill put myself in there
So you do like it? Hmm... What's that? I couldn't hear you.
[ but naturally, he does notice how evident the embarrassment is. Tsurumaru's cheek turning a darker shade is very obvious, and Hijikata only responds by placing his hand on his cheek - swiping a thumb against it. ]
Is it because of my voice - do you like it when I talk to you like this?
[ he only responds to that wry smile with a smirk. ]
So you are expecting something? You're so tense, it makes me want to tease you. [ he pulls Tsurumaru closer to give him a kiss on the cheek. Tsurumaru can probably feel Hijikata's breath when he follows that kiss with a small chuckle. ]
You get embarrassed too easily.
[ you can try to hide it with sarcasm, Tsuru... but it's all over your face. ]
stop you'll do dirty things with him in the sin bin also help me im Dying in the feel puddle
[ it's true that any sort of embarrassment will show through before he can hide it — and in this situation, he can't even bury his face in his hands, as he usually would; not that doing that would help, but he can try... ]
Of course I like it. Why would you ask something that obvious?
[ HUFF!!! immediately, he just snaps his mouth shut, because what he'd thought to and what he'd actually said were two completely different things... there's a stranger thought that nearly follows his words, but he manages to keep it unspoken; although, it would have sounded a whole lot like, i like everything about you.
but then he's pulled forward, and there's a curious sensation against his cheek — and while swords don't know about this in the way that humans do, it doesn't take much for him to realize, glancing up at hijikata with a stunned, awed sort of look, and what he doesn't know how to vocalize expresses itself visually, all at once —
— which means, well... they now have falling cherry blossoms to go with this. they're falling at a fast rate! but he does know one thing — that it makes him happier than he remembers being in a very long time, enough to want to thoughtfully return the favor, tilting his head to shake some petals out of his hair. ]
I expected something more like... this.
[ he takes a deeeeeep, confident breath... and then leans his weight forward, gently pressing his lips against hijikata's, this time. ]
[ Hijikata only stops for a moment, he stops his teasing words and other comments when the sakura petals fall. he only blinks, taking it all in. this time he's not surprised but he registers once again what this all means from Tsurumaru's earlier explanation when the first time it happened.
well... it's kind of cute, when you think about it.
he accepts the gesture, only smirking against the lips against his own for a moment before pulling away after a few moments. ]
Now who's the one being forward ?
[ yet... it was comforting. the one gesture he likes. it reminds him of that one night, strangely enough. when the first tears in awhile spilled from his eyes when he realized how afraid he was. yet, someone was in his arms and there was someone there he can touch and kiss.
but also how uncool, Hijikata was trying to regain cool points? he should be the one to be forward like such! he'll regain them.
obviously, he knows what he's doing by how he takes control of the entire situation. he uses his hand on Tsurumaru's cheek to tilt his head in the right direction, to the side and bring him forward. he's gentle about it, the kiss and his touches on Tsurumaru's face.
it only last several seconds before Hijikata has to pull away. that same smirk not leaving his face, yet except now does it look more like a gentler smile? perhaps. ]
[ it's not as if tsurumaru is some pure forest maiden — he's far from it, actually, with kousetsu trying to drag him to their local church every weekend, and the things that come out of his mouth could incinerate a nun on the very spot; it's just that hijikata has far more experience and, therefore, is better at everything, and since he knows that he can't compete with that, he's just going to go ahead and accept it.
he's a little surprised when he's pulled forward a second time, but he has no objections; except this time, it's far more gentle of a gesture than he'd expected, coming from a man who seemingly prides himself on his harsh, intimidation tactics.
so once hijikata breaks away, he smiles, pressing his cheek against the curve of his palm; and when he speaks, his words sound breathless. ] Just like that.
[ even among swordhaus, tsurumaru is by far the most finicky one about touch (and how much he usually doesn't want to be touched), which just goes to show how much all of this means to him — a whole lot. not that he'll say any of that directly, though, because he, too, has tsundere layers.
but for now, he's more than sufficiently embarrassed, so he pushes forward, draping himself over hijikata to quickly bury his face against the side of his neck. ]
For the record, it's still you. It's always going to be you. [ — about being forward, he means, despite how muffled it comes out.
but, you know, that does sound like something else entirely... ]
[ well, he does pride himself on harsh, intimidation tactics but he also prides himself on how he can woo just about anyone with simple words and romantic gestures. do you think he went to Shimabara just to intimidate geishas? please.
and what a shame! he could do so much more but several predicaments now are stopping him... but maybe seeing that embarrassed face is just as satisfying for now.
ah... but this all started because he just felt compelled to hold his hand? for some strange reason. how weird, even if he tries to question why he did it there's no straight answer other than he wanted to. he felt like it. strange. ]
That's an odd thing to say.
[ he pauses for a moment... ] Are you that embarrassed? Was that your first kiss?
[ out of pure curiosity. he has to know? ]
so that we can roast but at least together ride or die
[ UM maybe he wanted to sit and have tea with them, and then write about his dirty exploits with them afterwards in the form of horrible haikus... excuse you, that's filthy. evidence will be found in your filthy sin book of hogyoku.
but at that question, he only pushes his face against hijikata's shoulder even further, because it's embarrassing?? why is he like this??? ]
N..........
[ for some reason, though, tsurumaru finds himself unable to utter out a complete 'no' — which is completely weird to him, because he's used to lying as a habit, such as when he claims that he hasn't eaten the last cheese stick from the fridge, or when he claims that no, he wasn't the last one who used all the bleach.
he tries to spit out a 'no' again, and... yup, it's not happening.
so he takes a breath, whispering reaaaally very, very quietly, almost under his breath so that only god can hear — ]
[ look he only writes haikus about nature... just stop! you'll find nothing.
so it's rather amusing how Tsurumaru tries to deny, to remain all cool or something like that. but he hears that yes! he hears it. Hijikata can only presume that though, since he's a sword... do swords kiss people a lot - ah... wait, that's right. he's a sword. he just kissed a sword?
Hijikata covers his mouth for a moment, obviously thinking very... very deeply about this. damn. he just did that? (who do you think he is... Kondou-san...) well, once again, he was compelled to hold his hand and then it just went off from there. Hijikata is pretty shameless anyway, so whatever...?
though, usually when Hijikata does anything he's 100% sure what he's going to do! this is weird... his mind hurts, he just won't question it. it felt ... pretty nice anyway, so... he lowers his hand. ]
Is that so? Well, it was pretty obvious with how you did it anyway.
[ tsk tsk... no skill!
it's just fun to tease him when he's embarrassed okay? ]
You can stop hiding though, no one else is watching. [ even the dog is asleep right on Hijikata's lap... no one can see! ]
[ look, it's different... kondou's actually into his sword sword?? the cold steely sword??? but maybe some of that's rubbed off on hijikata... now he can live with existential guilt forever, or go take a refreshing, purifying nap at church's doorsteps.
of course, while tsurumaru thinks that this all came out of nowhere (thanks, ceres!), he's not bothered by it in any way; rather, he's more concerned about whether or not he'd reacted properly, because not only is he a sword, he's a sword that generally isn't very fond of learning how humans function.
but he's sure — that without a doubt, that curious feeling in his chest had made him want to lean forward and kiss him, even if he's never done it before.
if hijikata says so, tsurumaru pulls himself back, reaching up to shake a few more petals out of his hair with both hands. somehow, ume slept through all of that... and then he lets out an offended huff, because leave him alone!!!! he's doing his best!!! ]
Listen, I don't make a habit of going around and kissing people. If that wasn't good enough for you, you could just tell me.
[ ugh, tsuru's buttons are pushed... how the tables have tabled! his cheeks are still a bright pink, though, so is his outburst really as effective as he wants it to be?
anyway, he pauses; and during that pause, he's just going to place his fingertips against his own mouth again, before quietly adding, while glancing away: ]
No need to get so huffy, like I said - that kind of face makes me want to tease you.
[ so, even Tsuru's buttons can get pushed? a part of him didn't know that was possible, but note to self: pushable buttons are indeed pushable if you embarrass him first. amazing.
Hijikata isn't even trying to be mean or anything, gosh. Tsuru is so huffy right? very, very huffy! it's all very amusing to Hijikata, because he loves to tease. so yes, he takes this opportunity every chance he gets. he probably has such a smug look on his face now... ]
Well, that is written all over your face. [ Hijikata is experienced, he would be offended if he didn't like it. but... he runs his hand through his bangs, a few sakura petals fall out of his hair. ]
... and all over the floor. Just as cute as the first time, though, I admit.
[ gosh, it's possible, but no one ever manages to actually do it! because tsurumaru usually manages to annoy the living hell out of whoever it is, before they even get a chance to push his buttons... but then hijikata goes and surprises him like this, how unfair.
of course, hearing that doesn't make him any less huffier — there's this indignant sort of sound that comes from him, like how dare hijikata say that... but he looks so smug??? how dare he??? ugh!!! what is this.
he opens his mouth, as if he's going to make a snarky remark, but instead, he lets out a laugh. you know, the laugh that you laugh when you're trying to hide something and end up revealing yourself even more... ]
Cute? I... don't know what you're talking about.
[ ....haha! inconspicuously sweeping up petals with his hands... making little sakura fubuki mountains! trying to hide his embarrassment and failing. and then, with his head bowed and his attention still fixed on the petals, his next words are spoken more softly. ]
You're not allowed to say things like that. If you do, then I don't know what to do.
[ Hijikata is a truthful man! sure, he might say things just to simply woo people but you know, this is different! he doens't like to lie.
but lord... he knows that kind of laugh. so time to regain some of that self control, despite how touchy he wants to get... ah, that's so weird. so, what's a better way to keep hands off is to just... nonchalantly rub the back of your head with your hand? yeah, that's what he's doing - that, or running his hand through his hair every now and then. he lets out a sigh.]
Okay. Don't play dumb, are you hiding something?
[ straight and to the point! ] I told you, if something bothers you don't make sour faces and hide it.
[ listen, he's not making a sour face!! but the conditions under which he'd mentioned this before weren't exactly... ideal, so after much deliberation, he decides to mention it again, extending his hand forward. ]
Here, give me your hand.
[ he takes hijikata's hand, pressing it against his own chest, and while he's not human in any way, they still function like humans to an extent — such as when they get embarrassed, their heart rates increase a whole lot, you know! little things like that... which is what he's trying to show him. ]
Every time I've really liked someone, or I've thought that maybe, this person isn't so bad after all... I don't need to go into detail, do I? You saw what happened to them. [ he's talking about the mirrors, but he presses on, with constant gaps of hesitation between his words, because this is hard for him to say, ok!! ]
And, well... I like you more even more than I liked those people, and I loved those people with everything that I had.
[ and then he lifts his head to meet his gaze, searching his eyes for an answer. ] It's scary, like — if you keep saying things that make me do this, what if I kill you, too?
[ don't worry, they got a nice memento from That Moment. if a broken leg counts. Hijikata's not mad about it though, just grumpy and sour because he actually has to rest, and not work. what really mattered was Tsurumaru's own safety anyway, they made it out alive and that's what matters.
so swords do have heartbeats...
hearing something like that is always flattering, isn't it?
Hijikata only stays silent for a moment, but it isn't really a long one. mostly because his answer is certain. ]
That's ridiculous, do you really think I can die so easily? [ he pauses... before saying something less haughty. ]
Though, everyday I keep pressing forward... so I honestly don't know how long I'll live, I don't know when I'll die - naturally, by now, I already accepted my life might be short because I just don't know. But if there's one thing I know, if I'm going to die it's definitely going to be on the battlefield.
[ because that's what samurais do. they fight until the end, they die an honourable death in battle. ] But even so... Killing me isn't an easy feat.
I don't think you have anything to worry about.
[ ... another pause. ]
But maybe I can try to stay alive all I can. [ it's strange because Hijikata always had accepted short life considering he's a samurai. that's just how it is. but does he really want to try to stay alive for another sake? it's kind of odd, yet... he isn't too sure. ]
[ absolutely?? people are so fragile and their lives can be extinguished, just like that, even though they make all these grandiose claims about living forever, as if living forever is good and desirable. take it from a thousand year old spirit, it's not desirable at all.
but he listens carefully, more amused by hijikata's words than anything else, as if he has free reign over where he dies and how he dies, because life is full of surprises! you never know what exciting trials of death await you everyday... but needless to say, he's impressed by how noble all of that was. ]
That's very samurai-like, you know. If you could try your hardest to stay alive, I think I'd appreciate it.
[ hijikata gets an approving smile!! and this really proud look, because hearing such simple, honest things like that reminds him of his own people. but then, a thought occurs to him, and he suddenly lets go of hijikata's hand, brushing his arm away. ]
Ah, Kashuu told me something before — that you do this sort of thing a lot, with women.
[ he knows, hijikata... there's a pause, before he continues on in a colder tone that says this isn't very fine at all. ]
If that's still the case, then that's fine. I'm not going to stop you. [ if he wants to thoroughly enjoy the pleasure district everyday, then tsurumaru isn't going to stop him... he'll take ume and leave and never speak to him again, but that shouldn't make too much of a difference, right!! ]
But, again — if that's still the case, then do tell me. Because, I really don't have any spare time to waste on humans who think of me as nothing but a pretty treasure.
it wasn't an uncommon where he lived, so those bad habits just kind of migrated over to Cerealia, honestly. but it almost sounds like he's being scolded by his brother, like back then how he got in trouble for flirting while on the job.
yeah, his habits are pretty awful...
Hijikata would naturally probably fight back, argue back if it was his brother but here he looks kind of sheepish. almost like a dog when you scold them for doing something bad? almost, though. maybe Tsurumaru caught that flash of embarrassment across his face. ]
You know, I haven't been going there lately. [ and by that he doesn't mean because he's been stuck in bed with a broken leg... actually he means like... even before! because... he's actually been spending a lot more time with people such as the other 'Gumis, Mikazuki and Tsurumaru?
so lately he didn't feel like going because by the end of the day he was pretty satisfied. he's not going to admit out loud that his pleasure district visits were just merely a distraction due to homesickness. no way. ]
Almost sound like my brother, geez... But I get it, it bothers you doesn't it. I admit... It's a pretty bad habit, huh... I would swear on my Samurai honour, or something but at the end of day I'm not really a real samurai.
[ truth be told, he's just a peasant. he kind of laughs what he said off, a lighthearted, short lived chuckle. ] But you have my word, alright? Straight from the heart.
[ once again. like he said before, he doesn't say his compliments to Tsurumaru just because. he means every word he says! Hijikata might still be sort of a troublemaker like in his youth but if there one thing he definitely is loyal, and he prides himself with that. ]
[ he catches that brief look of embarrassment and shame!! he sees it!! and he knows he's struck gold... but he's also not going to press that topic any further, because he's already gotten the reaction that he wanted.
tsurumaru can also affirm, for a fact, that hijikata hadn't been going this month — if he managed to actually get from his futon to his desk without tsurumaru noticing, then that was a miracle in itself. although, it's the months prior that he doesn't know about, and that worries him.
but while he can claim that he hadn't been expecting anything to begin with and try to blame his distrust and hatred of humanity, it's impossible for him to give up all hope; there had still been a part of him that would have been thoroughly disappointed if hijikata had picked the other option.
although, it doesn't look as if he needs to worry about any of that anymore. he tries to move his hand across the lower half of his face, but he can only cover so much, and regardless, it's obvious that he's more than just a little delighted. ]
I can't speak for all samurai, but at the very least — I don't think my family would mind if you swore on your samurai honor.
[ because, you know, while they're probably rolling over in their graves, if their spirits are floating around somewhere in the afterlife, then they'd probably want tsurumaru to move on and recover. he's been fixed on these people for 800 years... it's time for him to let go. ]
But I'll also accept it if it comes from your heart, as you say.
[ he takes a deep breath, and then, brightly — ]
I may be a sword that knows nothing about your era, and there's no doubt that I'm going to continue being a handful, but I hope that's fine with you.
[ because while Hijikata will honestly admit his bad habit is immature but surely… that can be fixed! he's a truthful guy, okay! he's 100% believable. accept his words from his heart! but damn… he can't believe he got scolded like that. it's almost been a good 15 years ever since he's been scolded like that? embarrassing? he scratches his cheek, trying to get his mind off that embarrassment - see, he's usually shameless but say the right things… you get the point. ]
Fine by me, I'm pretty sure I've dealt with worse anyway.
[ when you deal with many men every day… they're handfuls? troublemakers? ]
I'll just have to train you properly.
[ back at it again, with the dog metaphors… thus, ruining the mood probably. Tsuru will most likely never escape them though, to be honest. ]
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hijiwanwan) wrote2015-09-14 12:06 am
uhm try me!
Hmm... Maybe... [ a pause. here comes sarcastic response number 2 (but is it sarcastic!? hmm...). ] If you beg for it.
[ then there's Ume who lets out a tiny puppy whine every few seconds and butts her head against Hijikata's thigh. ]
She does a better job at it.
[ he retracts the hand from Ume and covers his mouth to stifle a small laugh. this is so amusing to him!? but, ah... he doesn't want to actually upset Tsurumaru though... strangely enough. ]
But if something bothers you, don't do the silent treatment and give me nasty looks. I can tell, you know.
uhm u'll throw out ur back running
for all we know, he could very well not be kidding at all. but he sees that opportunity!! so he reaches out, yanking at hijikata's wrist, trying to, well... there's a part of him that wants to hold his hand, and then there's another part of him that wants to press his cheek against his hand, but he goes with the second option.
except, he's still trying to tug... tug, tug... in the meantime — ] Not that anyone's ever let me do that, you know — to mention what bothers me.
[ because, you know, he's a sword. no one asks swords these questions as if they're actual people!!
he smiles sweetly, but in the way that people smile before they say something unpleasant. ] If you ask me, nasty looks are more effective.
no i wont >:/
[ we all know Hijikata's 100% down for that, let's be real.
it seriously feels like he's babysitting two kids now. there's a dog that keeps butting her head against his thigh, or trying to climb into his lap when Hijikata doesn't pay attention to her.
then there's Tsurumaru trying to tug at Hijikata's hand also like a kid.
Geez... ]
You guys are like kids... [ he sighs. what he doesn't notice is that Hijikata finds himself taking hold of Tsurumaru's hand and just... well, holding it!? he feels weird today... huh. ]
yes u will :/
currently, she's managed to wriggle her way onto his lap, and tsuru reaches out to idly scratch the back of her head with his free hand. ]
I'm way older than you. [ to him, hijikata's both a small, young sproutling and an incredibly old bean.
but then..... what's this? what's this! as of today, there seem to be lots of interesting developments... hmm... how curious..... ]
Oh? [ looking at the hand, then back at hijikata... and after blinking in surprise, he smirks. ] You're feeling a bit more forward today, aren't you?
leve me olone
[ how many times will he have to say this…
of course, when Tsurumaru comments about the hand holding thing, Hijikata only blinks. his eyes flicker down for a brief moment before he just huffs. ]
That's none of your business. [ but he… doesn't let go. if anything, his grip might feel a tad bit tighter, and squeeze Tsurumaru's hand… ]
Shut up. [ huff huff… if Tsurumaru tries to pull his hand or anything - he might find out Hijikata won't… let go yet. ]
nevr.... latches onto
Then, you should be willing to let go — [ an experimental yank, but if anything, his grip has only tightened.
while he does like to tease him, he's usually never this persistent?? so tsurumaru's going to cover all his bases first, just in case. ]
Did I do something wrong? You're only like this when I've knocked over your tea set, or bleached your dark kimonos... and I haven't done anything like that lately.
[ snrk... ] Or, is this something else entirely?
ew
[ nothing's wrong... it's just... weird!? hey, Hijikata's a pretty truthful guy, and he's pretty true to himself. usually when he's "forward" with whatever it is, he's pretty aware of it - and he does it on his own free will too.
it's not that he's embarrassed he's has just been caught off guard, for sure! that's it...
so now that Tsurumaru is kind of teasing him, it's kind of... he doesn't even know how to put it. if anything, it just makes him extremely huffy because he doesn't have control of the situation.
now he realizes; he's caught off guard, rendering himself speechless. he's just here, holding his hand and just saying nothing? Tsurumaru is teasing him too. it's not really anything cool or suave at all!?
Hijikata's losing his cool points. that's what matters. and he's going to fix it? ]
It's not that... [ he only reaches up with his other hand to grab Tsurumaru's chin to bring his face closer. closer, and closer... enough so that only Tsurumaru can hear Hijikata's faiiint whisper (not that there's... anyone else to hear it, unless you count the dog): ]
Do you dislike it? It can be something else entirely if that's what you want... You just have to say it.
this is why you're from a r18 cd series
still, even if his embarrassment is blatantly obvious, his cheeks a darker tint of red by now — he likes this, more than he wants to admit. he fumbles for words to say, but finds that none of them will make it right then and there; so instead, he gives hijikata's hand a light squeeze, glancing off towards the side. ]
No, I don't... dislike it at all. [ and for some reason, he adds on the next part, a bit more quietly. ] I think you should do it more often.
[ both the handholding and the... you know. anyway, while not as much as before, tsurumaru's going to attempt to regain some footing. there's a pause of deliberation, and then he bounces back with a wry smile, resuming the teasing sort of tone to his voice. ]
And, if I said that I wanted it to be something else... what would you do? Would you prove to me that there's actually some bite to your bark?
[ listen, ume might be asleep, but she's learning all of this filthy talk in her sleep... goodbye puppy purity. ]
look its not his fault. sits in the sin bin dont worry ill put myself in there
[ but naturally, he does notice how evident the embarrassment is. Tsurumaru's cheek turning a darker shade is very obvious, and Hijikata only responds by placing his hand on his cheek - swiping a thumb against it. ]
Is it because of my voice - do you like it when I talk to you like this?
[ he only responds to that wry smile with a smirk. ]
So you are expecting something? You're so tense, it makes me want to tease you. [ he pulls Tsurumaru closer to give him a kiss on the cheek. Tsurumaru can probably feel Hijikata's breath when he follows that kiss with a small chuckle. ]
You get embarrassed too easily.
[ you can try to hide it with sarcasm, Tsuru... but it's all over your face. ]
stop you'll do dirty things with him in the sin bin also help me im Dying in the feel puddle
Of course I like it. Why would you ask something that obvious?
[ HUFF!!! immediately, he just snaps his mouth shut, because what he'd thought to and what he'd actually said were two completely different things... there's a stranger thought that nearly follows his words, but he manages to keep it unspoken; although, it would have sounded a whole lot like, i like everything about you.
but then he's pulled forward, and there's a curious sensation against his cheek — and while swords don't know about this in the way that humans do, it doesn't take much for him to realize, glancing up at hijikata with a stunned, awed sort of look, and what he doesn't know how to vocalize expresses itself visually, all at once —
— which means, well... they now have falling cherry blossoms to go with this. they're falling at a fast rate! but he does know one thing — that it makes him happier than he remembers being in a very long time, enough to want to thoughtfully return the favor, tilting his head to shake some petals out of his hair. ]
I expected something more like... this.
[ he takes a deeeeeep, confident breath... and then leans his weight forward, gently pressing his lips against hijikata's, this time. ]
nothing can stop him >:D
well... it's kind of cute, when you think about it.
he accepts the gesture, only smirking against the lips against his own for a moment before pulling away after a few moments. ]
Now who's the one being forward ?
[ yet... it was comforting. the one gesture he likes. it reminds him of that one night, strangely enough. when the first tears in awhile spilled from his eyes when he realized how afraid he was. yet, someone was in his arms and there was someone there he can touch and kiss.
but also how uncool, Hijikata was trying to regain cool points? he should be the one to be forward like such! he'll regain them.
obviously, he knows what he's doing by how he takes control of the entire situation. he uses his hand on Tsurumaru's cheek to tilt his head in the right direction, to the side and bring him forward. he's gentle about it, the kiss and his touches on Tsurumaru's face.
it only last several seconds before Hijikata has to pull away. that same smirk not leaving his face, yet except now does it look more like a gentler smile? perhaps. ]
Like that?
ugh just sets him in the flames of hell
he's a little surprised when he's pulled forward a second time, but he has no objections; except this time, it's far more gentle of a gesture than he'd expected, coming from a man who seemingly prides himself on his harsh, intimidation tactics.
so once hijikata breaks away, he smiles, pressing his cheek against the curve of his palm; and when he speaks, his words sound breathless. ] Just like that.
[ even among swordhaus, tsurumaru is by far the most finicky one about touch (and how much he usually doesn't want to be touched), which just goes to show how much all of this means to him — a whole lot. not that he'll say any of that directly, though, because he, too, has tsundere layers.
but for now, he's more than sufficiently embarrassed, so he pushes forward, draping himself over hijikata to quickly bury his face against the side of his neck. ]
For the record, it's still you. It's always going to be you. [ — about being forward, he means, despite how muffled it comes out.
but, you know, that does sound like something else entirely... ]
WHY.... THE F
and what a shame! he could do so much more but several predicaments now are stopping him... but maybe seeing that embarrassed face is just as satisfying for now.
ah... but this all started because he just felt compelled to hold his hand? for some strange reason. how weird, even if he tries to question why he did it there's no straight answer other than he wanted to. he felt like it. strange. ]
That's an odd thing to say.
[ he pauses for a moment... ] Are you that embarrassed? Was that your first kiss?
[ out of pure curiosity. he has to know? ]
so that we can roast but at least together ride or die
but at that question, he only pushes his face against hijikata's shoulder even further, because it's embarrassing?? why is he like this??? ]
N..........
[ for some reason, though, tsurumaru finds himself unable to utter out a complete 'no' — which is completely weird to him, because he's used to lying as a habit, such as when he claims that he hasn't eaten the last cheese stick from the fridge, or when he claims that no, he wasn't the last one who used all the bleach.
he tries to spit out a 'no' again, and... yup, it's not happening.
so he takes a breath, whispering reaaaally very, very quietly, almost under his breath so that only god can hear — ]
Yeah, it was.
miitomo voice: ride on...
so it's rather amusing how Tsurumaru tries to deny, to remain all cool or something like that. but he hears that yes! he hears it. Hijikata can only presume that though, since he's a sword... do swords kiss people a lot - ah... wait, that's right. he's a sword. he just kissed a sword?
Hijikata covers his mouth for a moment, obviously thinking very... very deeply about this. damn. he just did that? (who do you think he is... Kondou-san...) well, once again, he was compelled to hold his hand and then it just went off from there. Hijikata is pretty shameless anyway, so whatever...?
though, usually when Hijikata does anything he's 100% sure what he's going to do! this is weird... his mind hurts, he just won't question it. it felt ... pretty nice anyway, so... he lowers his hand. ]
Is that so? Well, it was pretty obvious with how you did it anyway.
[ tsk tsk... no skill!
it's just fun to tease him when he's embarrassed okay? ]
You can stop hiding though, no one else is watching. [ even the dog is asleep right on Hijikata's lap... no one can see! ]
(miitomo voice) spend ur time doing hijikata
of course, while tsurumaru thinks that this all came out of nowhere (thanks, ceres!), he's not bothered by it in any way; rather, he's more concerned about whether or not he'd reacted properly, because not only is he a sword, he's a sword that generally isn't very fond of learning how humans function.
but he's sure — that without a doubt, that curious feeling in his chest had made him want to lean forward and kiss him, even if he's never done it before.
if hijikata says so, tsurumaru pulls himself back, reaching up to shake a few more petals out of his hair with both hands. somehow, ume slept through all of that... and then he lets out an offended huff, because leave him alone!!!! he's doing his best!!! ]
Listen, I don't make a habit of going around and kissing people. If that wasn't good enough for you, you could just tell me.
[ ugh, tsuru's buttons are pushed... how the tables have tabled! his cheeks are still a bright pink, though, so is his outburst really as effective as he wants it to be?
anyway, he pauses; and during that pause, he's just going to place his fingertips against his own mouth again, before quietly adding, while glancing away: ]
Also, I, uh... kind of... really liked that...
LOOK... hERE....
[ so, even Tsuru's buttons can get pushed? a part of him didn't know that was possible, but note to self: pushable buttons are indeed pushable if you embarrass him first. amazing.
Hijikata isn't even trying to be mean or anything, gosh. Tsuru is so huffy right? very, very huffy! it's all very amusing to Hijikata, because he loves to tease. so yes, he takes this opportunity every chance he gets. he probably has such a smug look on his face now... ]
Well, that is written all over your face. [ Hijikata is experienced, he would be offended if he didn't like it. but... he runs his hand through his bangs, a few sakura petals fall out of his hair. ]
... and all over the floor. Just as cute as the first time, though, I admit.
[ back to teasing...? ]
YOU LOOK HERE......
of course, hearing that doesn't make him any less huffier — there's this indignant sort of sound that comes from him, like how dare hijikata say that... but he looks so smug??? how dare he??? ugh!!! what is this.
he opens his mouth, as if he's going to make a snarky remark, but instead, he lets out a laugh. you know, the laugh that you laugh when you're trying to hide something and end up revealing yourself even more... ]
Cute? I... don't know what you're talking about.
[ ....haha! inconspicuously sweeping up petals with his hands... making little sakura fubuki mountains! trying to hide his embarrassment and failing. and then, with his head bowed and his attention still fixed on the petals, his next words are spoken more softly. ]
You're not allowed to say things like that. If you do, then I don't know what to do.
im lookin...
[ Hijikata is a truthful man! sure, he might say things just to simply woo people but you know, this is different! he doens't like to lie.
but lord... he knows that kind of laugh. so time to regain some of that self control, despite how touchy he wants to get... ah, that's so weird. so, what's a better way to keep hands off is to just... nonchalantly rub the back of your head with your hand? yeah, that's what he's doing - that, or running his hand through his hair every now and then. he lets out a sigh.]
Okay. Don't play dumb, are you hiding something?
[ straight and to the point! ] I told you, if something bothers you don't make sour faces and hide it.
i forgot why you were looking now
Here, give me your hand.
[ he takes hijikata's hand, pressing it against his own chest, and while he's not human in any way, they still function like humans to an extent — such as when they get embarrassed, their heart rates increase a whole lot, you know! little things like that... which is what he's trying to show him. ]
Every time I've really liked someone, or I've thought that maybe, this person isn't so bad after all... I don't need to go into detail, do I? You saw what happened to them. [ he's talking about the mirrors, but he presses on, with constant gaps of hesitation between his words, because this is hard for him to say, ok!! ]
And, well... I like you more even more than I liked those people, and I loved those people with everything that I had.
[ and then he lifts his head to meet his gaze, searching his eyes for an answer. ] It's scary, like — if you keep saying things that make me do this, what if I kill you, too?
i forgot my title thats what i frogot
so swords do have heartbeats...
hearing something like that is always flattering, isn't it?
Hijikata only stays silent for a moment, but it isn't really a long one. mostly because his answer is certain. ]
That's ridiculous, do you really think I can die so easily? [ he pauses... before saying something less haughty. ]
Though, everyday I keep pressing forward... so I honestly don't know how long I'll live, I don't know when I'll die - naturally, by now, I already accepted my life might be short because I just don't know. But if there's one thing I know, if I'm going to die it's definitely going to be on the battlefield.
[ because that's what samurais do. they fight until the end, they die an honourable death in battle. ] But even so... Killing me isn't an easy feat.
I don't think you have anything to worry about.
[ ... another pause. ]
But maybe I can try to stay alive all I can. [ it's strange because Hijikata always had accepted short life considering he's a samurai. that's just how it is. but does he really want to try to stay alive for another sake? it's kind of odd, yet... he isn't too sure. ]
your re: title game was real
but he listens carefully, more amused by hijikata's words than anything else, as if he has free reign over where he dies and how he dies, because life is full of surprises! you never know what exciting trials of death await you everyday... but needless to say, he's impressed by how noble all of that was. ]
That's very samurai-like, you know. If you could try your hardest to stay alive, I think I'd appreciate it.
[ hijikata gets an approving smile!! and this really proud look, because hearing such simple, honest things like that reminds him of his own people. but then, a thought occurs to him, and he suddenly lets go of hijikata's hand, brushing his arm away. ]
Ah, Kashuu told me something before — that you do this sort of thing a lot, with women.
[ he knows, hijikata... there's a pause, before he continues on in a colder tone that says this isn't very fine at all. ]
If that's still the case, then that's fine. I'm not going to stop you. [ if he wants to thoroughly enjoy the pleasure district everyday, then tsurumaru isn't going to stop him... he'll take ume and leave and never speak to him again, but that shouldn't make too much of a difference, right!! ]
But, again — if that's still the case, then do tell me. Because, I really don't have any spare time to waste on humans who think of me as nothing but a pretty treasure.
re: hi! *balloon*
it wasn't an uncommon where he lived, so those bad habits just kind of migrated over to Cerealia, honestly. but it almost sounds like he's being scolded by his brother, like back then how he got in trouble for flirting while on the job.
yeah, his habits are pretty awful...
Hijikata would naturally probably fight back, argue back if it was his brother but here he looks kind of sheepish. almost like a dog when you scold them for doing something bad? almost, though. maybe Tsurumaru caught that flash of embarrassment across his face. ]
You know, I haven't been going there lately. [ and by that he doesn't mean because he's been stuck in bed with a broken leg... actually he means like... even before! because... he's actually been spending a lot more time with people such as the other 'Gumis, Mikazuki and Tsurumaru?
so lately he didn't feel like going because by the end of the day he was pretty satisfied. he's not going to admit out loud that his pleasure district visits were just merely a distraction due to homesickness. no way. ]
Almost sound like my brother, geez... But I get it, it bothers you doesn't it. I admit... It's a pretty bad habit, huh... I would swear on my Samurai honour, or something but at the end of day I'm not really a real samurai.
[ truth be told, he's just a peasant. he kind of laughs what he said off, a lighthearted, short lived chuckle. ] But you have my word, alright? Straight from the heart.
[ once again. like he said before, he doesn't say his compliments to Tsurumaru just because. he means every word he says! Hijikata might still be sort of a troublemaker like in his youth but if there one thing he definitely is loyal, and he prides himself with that. ]
re: hello! *squishies balloon*
tsurumaru can also affirm, for a fact, that hijikata hadn't been going this month — if he managed to actually get from his futon to his desk without tsurumaru noticing, then that was a miracle in itself. although, it's the months prior that he doesn't know about, and that worries him.
but while he can claim that he hadn't been expecting anything to begin with and try to blame his distrust and hatred of humanity, it's impossible for him to give up all hope; there had still been a part of him that would have been thoroughly disappointed if hijikata had picked the other option.
although, it doesn't look as if he needs to worry about any of that anymore. he tries to move his hand across the lower half of his face, but he can only cover so much, and regardless, it's obvious that he's more than just a little delighted. ]
I can't speak for all samurai, but at the very least — I don't think my family would mind if you swore on your samurai honor.
[ because, you know, while they're probably rolling over in their graves, if their spirits are floating around somewhere in the afterlife, then they'd probably want tsurumaru to move on and recover. he's been fixed on these people for 800 years... it's time for him to let go. ]
But I'll also accept it if it comes from your heart, as you say.
[ he takes a deep breath, and then, brightly — ]
I may be a sword that knows nothing about your era, and there's no doubt that I'm going to continue being a handful, but I hope that's fine with you.
my balloon :^(
[ because while Hijikata will honestly admit his bad habit is immature but surely… that can be fixed! he's a truthful guy, okay! he's 100% believable. accept his words from his heart! but damn… he can't believe he got scolded like that. it's almost been a good 15 years ever since he's been scolded like that? embarrassing? he scratches his cheek, trying to get his mind off that embarrassment - see, he's usually shameless but say the right things… you get the point. ]
Fine by me, I'm pretty sure I've dealt with worse anyway.
[ when you deal with many men every day… they're handfuls? troublemakers? ]
I'll just have to train you properly.
[ back at it again, with the dog metaphors… thus, ruining the mood probably. Tsuru will most likely never escape them though, to be honest. ]
why are u filthy (peeps face)
bc u destroyed my balloon :(
um that was the price of not giving cheek squishies
i firgot my title again
(komyu voice) pop
AAA NO POPPING
um you're the one that said you pop..............a lot
*screams*
he scream at own ass