hijiwanwan | [Cerealia] Inbox

Well, people who know how to take care of themselves don't drag their injured selves out of bed when no one's looking.

[ in the meantime, maybe hijikata can entertain himself with one of those phone games that kashuu is showing him?? especially that one game where all he has to do is collect dogs... many different kinds of dogs. apparently, the option to name those dogs isn't even there, so what the heck.

but tsurumaru does laugh a little, shaking his head. ]

Ahaha, don't worry — yelling at you would be pretty weird to me, you know? That means I'd actually have to be kind of responsible, and — [ he scrunches up his face. ] — I don't wanna do that.

Plus, why would I take the time to be angry at you, when I can just release your poetry to the entire world? Or spill ink all over your papers? Or wash even more of your kimonos with bleach? [ he blinks in hijikata's direction — innocently, like why would hijikata make him do any of this? why would he bring it upon himself! ]

[ when will someone show him the dog game.

not like he would actually play it though! ]

It'd be nice to see you be responsible for once. But if you actually were I'd probably think you were possessed by a demon or something.

[ so just stay yourself Tsuru... be yourself.

but then he shoots Tsurumaru a glare. ] Don't think about touching my desk. Also, you ruined enough of my kimonos already... [ a sigh. ]

Seriously... Do you even know how to do laundry? I think I need to go buy new clothes at this rate...

That'd make for a good surprise, don't you think? I'll have to write that down for some other time...

[ one day, hijikata will come home and his house will be clean? the dishes will be washed? a very edible dinner will be there? and then tsuru will never do it again, because wow, that was way too much effort for a surprise.

while he's tempted to walk over to hijikata's desk right now and to rub his hands all over his paperwork, like does this upset you, his lips twist into a pout, because his laundry skills have just been insulted and that needs to be addressed first... which, in hindsight, is completely valid — when it comes to washing clothes that aren't white, well... let's say that they end up white anyway. or a nice, off-shade of brown. ]

I do. Do you know how often I have to wash white clothes? Have you seen what I wear?

[ huff.... huff. ] I'm working hard on learning, okay? I don't try this hard for just anyone, you know.

I'll hold it to you then. Surprise me.

[ except he might regret saying that later... Hijikata is slowly learning when to suspect Tsuru's surprises but you know, they do sometimes surprise him (re: scaring him after he washed up in the bathroom)... yep. ]

Shouldn't it be common sense not to add bleach to everything. If you didn't know you should've asked.

[ yes. he's going to give Tsurumaru shit about this. his kimonos were sacrificed. this means war? but true, he's been working hard and Hijikata can acknowledge that. so he only sighs. ]

Just don't be afraid to ask for help. But after this I do need to go buy new clothes since the damage has been done.

[ oh boy... shopping. ]

[ hijikata will truly regret giving tsuru maximum freedom with his surprises... scaring him behind the bathroom door was only a small surprise, too. ]

Back in my day, we didn't have bleach. I don't think they had bleach back in your day, either.

[ but asking makes him antsy!! he doesn't like to ask questions on how to do things, because he's grown and he can do everything on his own! (that, and if he stops to ask someone something, who knows if he'll ever see them again?) ]

I'd say you can go in a week, but in the meantime...

[ he reaches for his own cerevice again, showing hijikata the screen as he opens up the browser and types in "kimonos", then clicks on the "shopping" tab. and because these are magical cerevices, all of the shops shown are actually modern, real, and accessible! ]

Look! You can go shopping like this, for now.

[ well... maybe Hijikata is slowly creating a resistance to his surprises? he has to experience them to learn how to resist them! soon. his surprises will be futile. ]

Well, no... But I've learned a thing or two.

[ maybe Horikawa taught him how to use bleach and do laundry the ~modern~ way before he disappeared? gosh! Hijikata has been learning some things!

he takes a look at the screen and looks at all the results, pretty pictures and listings of very nice looking kimonos! this does seem pretty convenient... hm... ]

I'll look at it... It doesn't seem bad. Although, I'd rather look at the clothes I buy in person.

But... It'd probably be easier to shop if I didn't have this around my leg, though. [ this damn cast... he wants it off...! he will complain about this forever. ]

[ no.... that's not allowed! if hijikata ever becomes fully resistant to his surprises, tsurumaru will die. but geez, laundry is so hard, even if he's doing his best to learn. first, he has to group all of these colors together, and then there's dosages of detergent, and even settings on how hot the water should be??

see, see! isn't it convenient! there's kimonos in lots of colors, too, and he almost distracts himself as he scrolls down, admiring the patterns, but he fires back a retort soon enough. ]

Well, duh. Who wouldn't rather look at the clothes they buy in-person? [ DUH, HIJIKATA...

but you know, tsuru's not really letting hijikata go outside like that, so — ]

You can complain about how bored you are, or you can go shopping virtually with me. [ yes, with him...

because while he's no kashuu, tsuru loves shopping!! he especially loves it because it has nothing to do with his own credits!! mikazuki is always so, so generous. ]

Edited (im slep) 2016-03-14 07:28 (UTC)

[ well Tsuru this is what happens when you have to take responsibility for once! chores come with it! and work! lots of work. even if there was no work at all, dealing with Hijikata himself is a chore in itself...

he only lets out a huff. don't sass him! ]

Fine then.

[ he won't break his promise! so he won't complain about how bored he is and wants to go outside for now... ]

You ruined a lot of my black ones. I'll need to buy more of those... Probably. [ as much as he likes the colour red, it feels too flashy for him to wear every day. he needs his black! or maybe other colours, hm... ]

[ AAAAAA he's a part-time decorative sword, knowing what responsibility is doesn't fit that description at all!

dealing with hijikata isn't entirely a chore, actually... not that he's ever going to say that any time soon, but it's the thought in the brackets that counts!! ]

Aah, right... [ he grimaces, because yikes... while there were a few that survived, that was a lot of kimonos that sort of died that day. out with the old, in with the new!!

but tsuru, being typical tsuru, is quick to point out his favorite color — he even points at a particular kimono with gold patterns interwoven into it. ]

Have you considered white clothes? Aside from being a pain to keep clean, they're really pretty. Plus, it sort of works with the whole black-and-white aesthetic, doesn't it?

[ LOOK... he has to learn! Hijikata will have to whip him into responsible shape. somehow. he doesn't know how he will do it but - he will do it.

he contemplates it for a moment. he really isn't too sure, so he just ends up shaking his head. ]

Never. I think it'd be too bright for me so...

[ he really can't see himself in white... ] It's also really easy to get dirty, so I don't know how you even manage.

[ by dirty, he means... well, when you live where he was you did worry about getting blood everywhere sometimes? of course, the men did spend their time cleaning stains out of their haoris but that wasn't as hard as white kimonos. ]

[ somehow, he hadn't expected hijikata to agree with him in the first place, or at all — he never really struck tsuru as a white clothes kind of guy. but then again, most people don't see the appeal in dressing like that either, so tsuru understands, even if he's a little disappointed. ]

By now, I'm an expert at removing bloodstains — so if you ever bleed all over your clothes, I can totally help you out.

[ thumbs up! as if that's something to be proud of... nonetheless, because he expects hijikata to be utterly ancient with technology, tsuru will even point out some more basics so that hijikata doesn't bore himself to death.

plus, he's just really kind of excited!! this is all very exciting for tsuru to show off. ]

There's also other things you can shop for, too — you can order delivery from all these food places, and you can look in all these other stores, too! Whatever tickles your fancy, really.

[ making sure hijikata is looking, tsurumaru drags his thumb up, showing him the list of stores. among those are the place that he works at, the place that hijikata works at, and some other various stores like the grocery store, the pet store, etc.... ]

Well, that aside. Can you really see me wearing something bright like that?

[ not saying that white is bad. Tsurumaru admittingly looks really good in it - it matches him. as for Hijikata... red is very bright, but still... he makes it work? next to white, red would look much darker... he doesn't know. For someone who use to be a peasant farmer he really takes colour coordination very seriously? well no, he just wants to look good. that's all.

looking good is very important. ]

Hmm... Even pet stores are online?

[ sounds... too weird. why would you buy pets online!? ]

It's bright enough to make up for your personality, isn't it?

[ did he just go there.............. he went there................ but he's just joking, though, and it's apparent through his teasing tone!! please don't kill him.

but see, izuminokami pulls off the whole red-and-black look really well, and hijikata looks just like him. plus, that shade of red is more like a dark red? and it's filtered in with lots of black clothing, too. one day, tsuru will get hijikata in a white kimono, somehow... just watch! it's on his bucket list.

is that interest, perhaps! as if on cue, he opens up the link to the pet store, scrolling through their list of animals offered. (he's going to go out on a limb here and predict 'dog' as a joke, but little does he really know...) ]

They probably won't let you make any purchases online, but they'd probably show you prices, and at least which kinds of pets they have in stock.

Edited (IM TIRED IM SORRY) 2016-03-14 08:58 (UTC)

[ naturally, Hijikata only shoots a glare at Tsurumaru for that remark. ]

Do you want me to kill you?

[ don't say yes, that'll weird him out. also oops... accidental threat much? totally an accident because he knows he can't do much with his leg like this! double oops.

that's totally not interest though, there's no way he's interested! because he can only make one comment. ]

Well, that makes sense. Though, the Shinsengumi never allowed pets.

[ he's really tempted to say yes... but hijikata might actually kill him for that? so he tilts his head to the side a little, as if he'd said something pleasant, instead. ]

I could lie and say no, but you're always welcome to.

[ ugh... he'll be weirded out either way. that, and it's not as if he can actually kill him right now with his leg like that!! but tsurumaru puts it as gently as he can, when he mentions: ]

This isn't the Shinsengumi anymore, right? So you can go ahead and have any kind of pet that you want.

[ hijikata has 3 jobs and nothing to spend his money on? he needs to start spending it on a pup. ] I prefer birds, personally — but it's up to you!

[ no, Tsuru... you weren't suppose to say that? you're suppose to get scared, or something like that. why can't you be like the normal people! ]

Hey, wait -

[ a sigh! no... no... he can't? ] That doesn't mean I was implying I wanted a pet.

[ no??? he doesn't??? not at all! but he'll make one comment. ] I'm not surprised you would, but they don't seem like the kind of pets that'd listen. That's why I prefer dogs.

[ the most loyal pets! ]

[ because he's not like normal people! he's a thousand years old, and he truly deserves death's sweet embrace by this point.

but a puppy will be good for him — it'll run around the house, pee all over the floors, and burrow in his kimonos, and hijikata will have to chase after it! that sounds like fun!! ]

Somehow, I can't say that I'm surprised.

[ why is he tsun for puppy... that's okay, though, because tsuru will push him along towards the dog section anyway. he points towards the screen, which now displays available breeds. ]

Here, here, take a look. Do you have any sizes in mind? [ like... a small pup? a medium-sized pup? a big pup? ]

[ ugh when can Hijikata return to Hakodate. ]

Aren't you listening? I said I didn't want one.

[ also Hijikata works at the cybuddy doggy groomers... he sees enough dogs everyday. some of them aren't very well trained! the shame. ]

I thought we were just looking.

[ immediately, he puts a hand to his ear, like — ]

What's that? I couldn't hear you.

[ but of course, tsuru heard every word just fine... gosh, why won't hijikata appreciate his efforts? he opens up the large-sized dog section anyway, because something like a german shepherd would definitely suit hijikata. ]

We are just looking. There's no harm in looking for the kind of dog that you'd buy, as if you were buying a dog, right?

[ he reaches over and gives Tsurumaru's ear a good tug. pay back. ]

Pay attention.

[ but anyway! oh look at that! a dog breed he hasn't seen before? he actually hasn't even seen one at the cybuddy groomers either... huh. so he points to the german shepherd. ]

What's that one?

[ AAAAAAAA WHY ]

Ow, ow! You're so mean.

[ when hijikata lets go, tsurumaru pats his ear, checking that it's still, you know, there. but doesn't hiji work as a dog groomer! what is this...

he eagerly explains, anyway. ] That's a German Shepherd. It's mostly used as a guard dog, and it can get pretty scary — it's a lot like you!

It doesn't come in too many colors... mostly black and brown, and then just black, if you're lucky. Those are more expensive, too.

I wouldn't be if you behaved.

[ common sense, Tsuru... common sense. ]

Is that so... [ maybe he's groomed one? he doesn't remember. leave it to dogs to be extremely expensive though... that's not even including items to take care of it as well.

well, he hasn't checked his credit balance in ages, but Hijikata knows he has more than enough to provide for a dog. NOT LIKE... he wants one or anything! no way... ]

They look nice, although it's hard to judge just from pictures. [ he reaches over for the phone screen and swipes towards the medium sized dog section to look at those instead. ]

But behaving is so boring.

[ common sense.... he doesn't know what that is. he's too old for common sense!

nonetheless, hijikata should surely have enough for the basics! a food bowl, a water bowl, some toys, a fluffy dog bed... and, well, he can draw on his own kink collection for collars and leashes, right? if not, then the dog collars that tsuru brought over (as a joke) can perhaps be of some use.

so he watches as the list of medium sized dogs appears, pressing his finger against the screen to stop it from scrolling once he sees a certain breed. ]

Aah, look! It's a Shiba — those are familiar, right? [ shibas in many colors... brown shibas, black-and-brown shibas with the >:) eyebrows, and even this one funky-looking shiba with really long black socks on its legs! ] If you want one, we should go see one.

[ aren't you suppose to gain common sense the more you live... what the heck.

he nods. ]

Yeah, I use to see them sometimes...

[ Pretty nice dogs! if they were trained right they were pretty loyal dogs, so Hijikata's heard at least. he pauses for a moment, then points towards a picture. ]

That one has a pretty interesting pattern, don't you think? [ the one with the black socks! but then he huffs. ] I told you... We were just looking.

[ he's going to be stubborn about this... ]

[ not when you've seen Rough Times for a thousand years... all of those common sense marbles? gone.

but that's interest, yes... definitely interest! hijikata can try to say all he wants otherwise! tsurumaru's eyes widen, because he's also taken a liking to that black sock pattern — it's not everyday that you see dogs like that, actually. ]

Aah, that one's pretty! I bet it's super cute, too.

[ it's perfect! this is it, this is the end of the pet hunt... their ideal puppy is here. ]

We can talk about which puppy is prettiest and still be just looking, you know.

[ huffing back! but obviously, he's going to scheme on going past "just looking". ] Anyway, how much is it? Is it too much?

that doesnt mean you know the dirt holes of the 13th century :/

if theres one thing i dont want its where-to-pee knowledge

then what knowledge Do you want

something that isnt related to dirt holes?

like... the latest, hottest deals on lingerie?

ugh no panties

why are you saying no to panties

no...panties... unless ur gonna miss.... the panty raid

yes... the panty raid... hiji will look in his drawers and all his rope panties are gone

ugh leave the [komyu voice] ROPE UNDERWEAR alone

make me, i dare you :/ :\ :|

AAAAaaaa get ur own panties

i have rope too you stop this

keep ur own rope to urself

i'm not the one who ties rope around people's necks

im a vice captain i do what i want with my rope...

"i do what i want" - signed, hijikata

exactly!! no sassing the vice commander

sasses him anyway

*kills u*

:o :D >:D ???!?!?!?

STOP THIS

YOU STARTED IT

uhm no i didnt!

uhm yes you did!!

kills u